|A glimpse of confusion. Taken March 16, 2016.|
You might to just skip this part for this would be the most boring paragraph you'll ever read from this post, since this paragraph is dedicated to my thesis. But yeah, this is one of the turning point in my life. It is literally draining- physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. It could brought you down the lowest possible state of yourself, lower than the ground. Yes, I'm working on it. My data are not as positive as it should be and they are still pointless. I just had repeated the whole process again. It's like the effort and time were useless. But I guess, mistakes are part of life and we have to make room for it, though you like it or not. We have no choice but to embrace the fact that failures is like a milk to a baby. It will feed you, until you are intelligent and strong enough to be victorious! Doing thesis has made me realize the importance of renewing the mind, of attracting the positive forces by saying and telling, This was posted at my instagram account:
"I will GRADUATE this JUNE 2016. I will have POSITIVE AND GOOD RESULTS WITH MY THESIS! I'm claiming it Lord! THIS IS MY YEAR! THIS IS A YEAR OF HARVEST.
And yes! best things in life are the "unplanned ones". Definitely! It's just so comforting to know that in spite of my down and desperate moments, there are still people whom I can cherish my life with. There are still people that reminds me that "thesis" is not my entire life, it's just a part of it. It makes me realize how much time has passed and here I am, almost at the finish line. I am about to enter a new phase of my life. But before which, everything has to fall down, to be whole again. I sometimes enter the "confusion phase" in doing my experiments in which I have spent countless hours with no good/positive results. I begin to ask myself, "Am I gonna finish this?". Looking through my perspective, it's impossible. But no, God is with me, and I know He is.
|Burgers for Piso (march 16, 2016)|
Today, our city is celebrating its anniversary and it's also my day off. it's really weird to think that I call my experiments "duty". But yeah, I spent the afternoon with my awesome high school buddies. it's really awesome because my best friends and I are together for almost 8 years now. I know it's really awesome and I'm just so blessed to have them in my life, in spite of everything, here we are still. I've seen how we grew together, still we have lots of things in common. I'm so happy to have them as friends since not all people have someone whom they can call "real friends". We spent a really good time together, knowing that we are complete. Ah yes, it's really nice to be with those people whom you can say "I belong".
But YES! I'm back to reality again. Laboratory works tomorrow. Thinking about it makes me tired. It makes me bored and constricted (I can't find the right word). I just want to live free at the moment. I want to explore life and it's treasures. I want to be happy. I want to soar the hidden mysteries of the world that we are living in. I want to have a life, more than what I do in the laboratory, more than what is taught in the four walls of the classroom. I need to do something more. I need to extend to the limits of my capacity and of my existence. I would like to let my soul breathe and feel the breeze that I seldom notice.
What's your story?